You are currently browsing the category archive for the ‘unnecessary thoughts’ category.

Due to the release of Harry Potter 7-2 during my pregnancy month 7, week 2, I have cause to reflect on something that has always pestered me: change. As long as I can remember, I have had ridiculous anxiety over the idea of changes: my first year of middle school proved to be stress-ridden (for both me and my mother), my switchover to high school left a pit in my stomach, and the transition into college was rough to say the least.

In conjunction with my aversion to change, I also have an issue with things ending. However, this feeling is more complicated. I love the feeling of completion, yet hate the feeling of ending. I was excited to complete my high school career, but devastated that the particular chapter of my life had close. I love completing the reading of a book, but sad to see the story end.

Of course, we all know what today is: the release of the final Harry Potter film. Thinking about this gives me a slight bit of anxiety. I have anxiously awaited the arrival of each book and subsequent film. Each time a story ended, I was anxious to find out what would happen in the next one (much like the feeling that always seems to arise at the end of an episode of 24 – except the next book would be absolutely lovely and satisfying, unlike that let down that accompanies the 24 episodes). Each film ending made me anticipate the release of the next.

Yet now, the end will actually be the end. We’ve grown up with Harry Potter and crew. Remember when they were all just wee children? And the first Harry Potter movie was so much lighter, and it feels younger… because we were younger as well.

Little did we know back then that one day, Daniel Radcliffe would show off his goods. That
Emma Watson would become a lovely style icon. That Tom Felton would turn out to be quite the looker.That Richard Harris would not be with us through more than two films.

And now, it will all come to a close.

Naturally, the release of this movie snuck up on me (since with my current state of anxiety, this isn’t difficult to do). I haven’t even purchased tickets to see it, let alone decided on a date to see it. I feel like after all the years of anticipation and excitement, my current level of excitement is much to lackluster to merit the viewing of this film. In addition, I’m not quite sure I’m ready for this saga to end.

Now what will I obsess over and anticipate and get excited about? I didn’t even make plans to dress up (Snape was my choice since I think he is the unsung hero of the series – and since I look just like him if I skip washing my hair for a few days). How can I let this opportunity slip away? What will I now find as a new obsession?

Of course, my current state of elf-growing is also a cause to shudder at the thought of change and ending. All I can think of is the countdown until Brad gets home and then the countdown until the baby is out of my belly and then the countdown until I’ve recovered from the removal of said baby and then the countdown until I can start working out/eating less/getting rid of the extra baggage I am now so blessed to carry around. Unfortunately, I can’t just be satisfied with the completion of these waiting periods since I have made lengthy to-do lists that are not even a fraction of the way completed (isn’t that the way I go through life?). All I can think of is a wish for more time to accomplish the aforementioned tasks. But then my waiting becomes longer. But my wait time/project accomplishing window will end. And things will change. And new things will begin.

Although I don’t love my current state of semi-singleness, nor my state of impregnated-ness, I also don’t love the idea of it ending prior to my checklist being properly checked off. And isn’t it so sad that I spend my days counting down until the completion of something only to find that it has ended and I missed it and now I have to change and it will never be the same?

It’s like my little brother. I remember him as a baby. And a toddler. And how he’d open the door to my room at night when he was scared. I’d wake up to the silent sound of the door being opened. I’d pull out the trundle and let him sleep there. When he was 7, I left for college. And sometime since then, he blew up into this giant person.

Seriously?! When/how did that happen?! And now I’m going to have my own little baby. And knowing my luck, I’ll blink, and the baby will have grown into a giant person, just like my brother did. And because I’ve spent my time in countdowns and completions and avoiding change, I’ll miss the entire thing. And just like Harry Potter, it will sneak up on me without the proper amounts of excitement and anticipation.

 

Advertisements

Remember back when I used to blog? Me too.

Pregnancy crazy brain has taken on a new OCD form called “what I need to buy for my baby: go over the list about 1000x before going to sleep at night”.

So instead of sleeping, I try to decide what I want/need to buy.

a baby

 

 

For example:

– I want the Timi and Leslie Dawn diaper bag in Cloud Blue. Am I sure I don’t want it in black? Which will I like better? Do I need to get the cute mini as well?

– What “essentials” do I really need? I want a trash can with a lid for sure, and probably a thermometer because I see crazy brain’s next obsession being “is my baby sick/he feels a little hot”, and bottles seem like a general use, not to mention diapers (oh how I dread the thought of buying them already). Do I want a pump? Which pump is the best? Which diaper butt cream is the best? Am I missing essential items that I need/want?

– Will I find a glider on KSL for super cheap that I can cover in a gray fabric? Will I find a gray fabric? WHY DOES NOBODY MAKE MY IDEAL GRAY FABRIC?!

– Am I missing any books for my “now there’s a kid outside of me, what the freak do I do now?” library? Isn’t there an encyclopedia of new mom-hood that can teach me to breastfeed and read my baby’s mind?

– Must find Moby wrap. What color? Too many choices… I need something generally neutral. Black might get too hot, white might get too dirty, colors are a little bit gaudy (or do I love them?). WHY DOES NOBODY MAKE MY IDEAL GRAY FABRIC?!

– Baby will sleep in a playard. Check. Mom will pick out a good one. Will it be gray? I hope it’s gray. I want it to be gray. Thank heavens they make one in gray. Should I get a better one and sacrifice it being gray? Should I tell her that it is VITAL that the playard is gray? She can choose wisely, right? Maybe she’ll know other features that are more important than it being gray. Are there features that take precedence over the color gray?

Forgive me if my posting continues to be sparse; I might be checked into a psych ward shortly…

Randomly, I’ve had a craving to listen to Yellowcard (a few weeks ago, it was Gwen Stefani and No Doubt).

It definitely reminds me of my “younger days” (haha I sound like an oldie saying that) back when we’d spend the summers taking quick mini road trips to see bands play live. ::Insert classic photo here::

It also reminds me of an unrelated incident in which Cheeks and I showed up to the Motion City Soundtrack show wearing the EXACT same Limbeck shirt. Which has nothing to do with Yellowcard besides the fact that Cheeks liked Yellowcard a lot and that he once got me a killer acoustic CD of Yellowcard for Christmas one year, and that naturally led to the memory of us going to the show in our matchie Sadies duds.

Nice.

(Avondale

Joan Crawford knew what was up when she said these epic words:

“I think the most important thing a woman can have – next to talent, of course – is her hairdresser.”

Granted, it’s been MONTHS (6+ to be exact) since I have been able to traipse in Vegas long enough for a visit to Amrita, and it was about time we did something about my long nasty locks.

Ridiculous.

So my cousin Dayna hooked me up with a recommendation in Salt Lake and I’m getting my herr did today. However, it ALWAYS makes me nervous to try out a new hairstylist. My visits to Amrita go a little like this:

“Oh hi! What do you want to do today?”

“Umm… something fun and different, nothing short and dikey, let’s keep the length (or chop it or dye it out in a funky color or give it a chunk of bleach).”

“Are you open to bangs/dye/something awesome?”

::answer::

“I know JUST the thing! [insert explanation of amazingness]”

Hair is washed.

Hair is cut.

Hair is styled.

“I did

. Style it the same way as usual. Here’s a mirror so you can see the back.”

I beam and hold back tears of joy.

She is LITERALLY a genius/artist. I let her do whatever because she knows what will look good better than I do.

Naturally, a lot of hairstylists aren’t used to having this kind of freedom/responsibility. It’s all in her hands and what she thinks would look best. I’ve known her longer than I’ve known my husband so she kind of gets my style/has seen it evolve.

If I’m feeling like I do now on my next trip, this is how my conversation will begin: “I’m feeling blah because I’m uber pregnant, and I want to look like a rockstar, and I especially want to look good when the baby gets here in about a month. And we need to leave the dye out for when we go blonde this September.”

To which I’m sure she’ll respond, “I know JUST the thing. It’s going to be so cute!” And then she’ll work her magic and I’ll be impressed.

So pray for me today as I embark on this new experience for both me and my cousin’s hairdresser.

Warning: To those of you who love being pregnant/would love to be pregnant, there is a possibility that you will be offended by this post.

My pregnant but it doesn't look like it belly at somewhere around 12 weeks?

Besides the fact that it’s kind of cool that we’ll get a kid (mostly because I know how badly Brad wants one and because I can stay home and do nothing purposefully), I basically hate being pregnant.

Why am I such a Debbie Downer?

Because, my friends, I feel like being pregnant is a giant list of things I can’t do that I want to do. And, being inherently selfish, I don’t like this little fetus dictating my life for me.

For example, as a pregnant person, I cannot:
– Eat whatever I want. Ahh no, my taste buds are sensitive and picky and hate almost everything.
– Be skinny.
– Buy clothing that can be worn for the next 6 months in their entirety.
– Know what my size will be in six months.
– Eat sushi.
– Go surfing.
– Go to water parks and ride the rides.
– Ride rides in general.
– Move things (furniture, work fixtures, boxes, anything heavier than a baby carrot).
– Paint and stain things.
– Go to the gym then head straight to work (my body is tired ALL THE TIME).
– Sleep through the night (although this was an issue pre-pregnancy, it is heightened by a constant state of discomfort).
– Lie on my back/right side/stomach.
– Start up running again after a three month hiatus.
– Travel in August (or fly in July).
– Wear clothing comfortably (elastic touching ANY PART of my stomach makes me want to die).
– Avoid going pee (I HATE going pee and now I do it a thousand times a day).
– Wear heels like I normally do (I can, but my back pain starts making my life miserable after about ten minutes).
– Walk/stand/sit without a searing pain in my back (thank you fetus for loving my spine).

There are plenty more pessimistic thoughts that I have about this whole process, but this should suffice as my rant for now. Let’s just say that nine months is SO LONG and oh my gosh is it over yet?

Embarrassing Confession #1: Since Brad went out of town, I decided to watch Twilight Eclipse. I must admit that I was disappointed. It wasn’t as funny as the first two. Instead, it was kind of gag me awkward. But Alice is so cute.

Embarrassing Confession #2: Now I want to read the Twilight books. I’ve heard they’re an enjoyable read, and my co-workers all recommended them. So, I downloaded it onto an adobe reader thing (did you know you can “check out” electronic copies of books from the library for two weeks?! no late fees and I don’t even have to get dressed!).

Lest you think that I initiated this letter to admit my embarrassing facts to my techie friends, here’s the moral of the story:

I am 9 pages into the online book, and I have made a decision. I think I would love an e-reader.

{Side note: Embarrassing Confession #3: This all started when Daryl bought one on the Office. It just looked so convenient to read anything anywhere with one little boople.}

Regardless, I realized that when I read, I enjoy the following situation: listening to music that complements my reading while reading. Sometimes I read in silence, but my ADD self can pay better attention to reading if a distraction is already built into the experience, thereby blocking out other distractions. Plus, who runs on a treadmill/works out at the gym/uses an elliptical/rides a bike without listening to music?! Right. There must be auditory distraction from running.

Therefore, my question is:

Is there an e-reader/iPod combo? Something that can be used to read a lot of stuff and also simultaneously listen to music? Basically, if the Kindle and the iPod had a baby, I want to own their baby.

Does this exist?!

V-Day Love has officially ended. Sad Days (but happy that now I can start pretending/hoping/imagining that it’s spring).

Just a collection of hearts… something that can and should be worn year round.

Did you see these? Awesome.

I want to add heart patches to all of my striped clothing.

I ordered this ring for myself as a gift.(All I asked Brad for was a signed 8×10 of Jimmer Fredette, but that hasn’t happened yet…  keep your fingers crossed that I get it late!!)

How did I not know about this/buy this?!

 

A stolen photo of Britt’s amazing sheets (one day, I will make some too).

 

And lest we forget, the anatomical heart plush. I love this version of the heart too.

 

{Side note: While in London, I visited an exhibit on the heart which was probably one of the most fascinating things I have ever seen… except we spent WAY too much time in the first half (which was mostly about early surgery techniques and tools) and not enough in the second half that actually explored the heart as a symbol, an organ, and a significant aspect of all cultures… the moral is… I love hearts. In more ways than one.}

Wicked Valentine's Day

Wicked Valentine’s Day by horito featuring zipper jeans

Inspired by ruby red slippers, the wicked witch of the east, and those socks I’m pining for.  I’m still coveting those Cake by Petunia Pickle Bottom bags.

This could very well end up being {one of} my V-Day Love outfit{s} – perfect for Chinese take-out and the NBA Slam Dunk contest.

Blackboard Valentine's Day

Blackboard Valentine’s Day by horito featuring shell tops

An outfit for those who are not so inclined to wear red or pink on V-Day Love. Not too saccharine sweet, but still dressed up. The shoes – PAYLESS!! I seriously love them. I like the pops of red, and you can never go wrong with a poppy from Emersonmade.

Inspired by Kate Spade (again) and spun into a preppy vibe.

Sweet and Warm Valentine's Day

Sweet and Warm Valentine’s Day by horito featuring lace up shoes

 

The inspiration for this outfit came from where I WISH I was spending V-Day: somewhere warm and sunny. Lots of flow and ease.

Alternatively, for those of us not in a tropical paradise, alternative shoe and bag options are on the right to adapt the outfit to our less appealing climates.

A Teaser:

{A peek at next week’s blog posts: outfits for V-Day Love. We all know I LOVE V-Day Love, and we all know I LOVE getting dressed.}

 

The Tip: How-To Sundance Film Festival

Today started my second year of volunteering at the festival (which I LOVE – hands down the best part about living in Utah. No, second best. The first is working for Angie). A co-worker asked me how to do that.  Not a dumb question. To be honest, I had no idea how to Sundance until I volunteered.

The Sundance Institute throws this killer event each January, and the Film Festival puts up an awesome guide of all the movies onlineThings to note about choosing movies:

  • There are no ratings. Also, many movies push boundaries.
  • That being said – they are really awesome.
  • When a movie says “sexual”, it means it’s PRETTY SEXUAL. And “extremely violent” isn’t your normal violence, it’s usually beyond any other gore you’ve ever seen. There are key words that can mean certain things (like “coming of age” usually implies a sex scene, and graphic really does mean graphic) – I would go with my gut if screening for a younger audience.
  • Documentary does not equal crappy movie they show you in school. Last year I only saw documentaries and enjoyed all of them.

There is an awesome schedule up online as well. You can search it by city (Park City, Sundance Resort, Salt Lake City, or Ogden).

{City Side Note: If you want the vibe and excitement of the festival, Park City is the place to go. If you want a city experience like a movie theatre, Salt Lake has you covered. If you’d like a calmer ambiance with awesome scenery, hit up Sundance Resort. To be honest, I can’t account for Ogden since I’ve never ventured that far north for the festival.}

So, now that you know what you want to see, how do you get tickets? At this point, you have two options: individual tickets at a box office or waitlist.

Wait, what does this mean?! I will tell you.

Box Offices are located throughout the festival and tickets can be purchased in advance at these locations. Many shows are “sold out” of advance tickets, so finding a box office doesn’t necessarily guarantee you get in.  But, buying tickets at a box office does. 😉

The waitlist seems intimidating at first, but it’s not. To waitlist a movie, arrive 2 hours before the scheduled time (or 1 hour early for the first showing of the day). A kind volunteer can guide you to the waitlist line, where you will receive a waitlist number (each person can only get ONE number, so make sure everyone in your party is there).  You leave for an hour and a half to do whatever you want. 30 minutes prior to the show, you return to the theatre and line up according to number. Tickets are sold to the waitlist ($15, CASH ONLY) as theatre space allows. Often, volunteers can give you a rough guess of if it’s worth the wait (a number 50 usually means you’re out, but at some theatres, a 10 means you’re out as well).

Personal tips (not approved by anyone in the world, just random thoughts I would tell you if we were chatting over a hot dog):

  • Wear layers. Some theatres are cold while others are warm. PS it’s cold outside.
  • Bring a water bottle. And snacks.
  • Ask a volunteer. If you have questions, they are there to helpful. Even better, there’s a new volunteer position called a Festival Insider (people who know the ins and outs of the festival – ours is a volunteer of like, forever).  They have “Ask Me” buttons on and can share with you valuable information about almost anything.
  • Don’t cut it too close. You’ll turn into a stress case (like me).
  • Plan extra time for shuttles and walking and finding the shuttles. A shuttle ride generally takes about 30 minutes to go even the shortest distances. You can also walk but it’s FREEZING.
  • Carpool so you can save on parking.
  • Check out the map. And ride the free shuttles. The volunteers at each stop will help you get on the right bus.
  • Park City also has awesome art exhibits and such at New Frontier. Check them out. They’re pretty cool.
  • And a personal plug for the Sundance Resort: If you want to get in on the waitlist, chances are pretty good if you get to the Sundance Resort 2 hours early. That’s just enough time to eat at the Foundry Grill before seeing your movie.

Good luck! Let me know how it goes. Or if you have any other tips, please leave them in the comments!

If my wedding were, say, in three months, instead of three years ago, I’m 100% certain that this would be my wedding dress.

Alternatively, if I had a grand just lying around, I would buy it just because and wear it as often as possible.

So pretty… I love all the details and the understated ruffles and the white…. AND it’s called “blackberry jam” – how cute is that?!

{Once Wed via Wiley Valentine}

I’m still obsessed with Emma Watson (and I still have more Hermione inspired posts…).

I found this picture while searching for pictures/articles about her style:

This inspired two things: my obsession with travel, and my obsession with stuff.

Part one: We’ll tackle the latter first.

In this article that accompanied the first image, the author writes this profound statement:

“There are a few luxe items in which every fashionable woman should invest: a great handbag, an elegant timepiece and a timeless Burberry trench coat.”

This led me to a LONG search for a handbag for Christmas.  Instead of splurging on this one, I kept it conservative and will most likely be getting this one for 1/4 the cost.  ::sigh:: Oh recession. ;(

(don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the second purse as well… however just saying that makes me second guess myself)

Part two: In which we explore my obsession with travel.

Not only am I obsessed with traveling (which I do very little of as of late), but I am mostly obsessed with things related to traveling.  For example, I LOVE packing. To pack the contents of a well thought-out suitcase, I will set out my outfits three days prior and add to/subtract from the selections about twice a day.  I usually try to narrow it down a lot so as to not over pack, and I pride myself on my ability to do this.  (I’m also tempted to buy one of these.)

I also enjoy reading travel tips and packing tips, etc. And, of course, airport/traveling fashion.  When I went to London, I spent HOURS researching good ideas for airplane outfits that were not dowdy yet were still comfortable (my days of pjs and sweats on the plane have apparently passed). I ended up with a v neck American Apparel T, some stretch jeans?, a jacket, and a blanket? Yeah, I can’t really remember.

And so, I looked up images of other famous people and their airport outfits – they’ve got to be on top of their game regardless of the length of flight, and I absolutely love it.

(This outfit is definitely not practical – could you imagine having to take off OTK boots to go through security?!)

Perhaps this week I will treat you to my travel-inspired posts… if work and work don’t kill me first….

I absolutely loved the tent/camping/glamping in Harry Potter combined with Hermione’s clothing choices… of course.  I was worried that this whole nomad thing would get really old really fast, but instead, I loved every minute of it.  I owe this entirely to the styling/set.

I stole this image from Penny Lyra

I seriously am dying for the tent too… in addition to the bag. 😉

Of course, I don’t know if these are the same boots as in the winter scenes, but they are REALLY cute… And really similar to these Frye boots:

Which then reminded me of these Coach boots I saw the other day (a girl came into work wearing them and I instantly began coveting them):

Oh my gosh. They are seriously so pretty.  They made me regret buying the cognac boots that I already had bought… especially since I could get these ones for almost the same price… seriously. I’m having buyer’s remorse (and I seriously loved those other ones… the evils of coveting).

However, it made me ponder the idea that maybe I should just buy a Coach purse.  I had thought about getting a Marc by Marc Jacobs one earlier this year, but instead, maybe I’ll make it my goal to own this Coach bag:

Isn’t it pretty? I seriously think I’m in love. It’s a hobo style bag, which I’ve been searching and searching for, and it’s also a convertible cross-body, which I’ve also been looking for.  Not to mention the silver (instead of gold) detailing… I think it might be calling my name?

One of my goals this year is to buy less items but buy more items that I LOVE (not necessarily the same as spending less money… I could probably buy more expensive things and just buy less things and still end up spending the same amount of money as I would if I bought Lots and Lots of cheaper items… the only problem is narrowing it down to fewer items).

I’m also trying to save for a couch… so this is definitely impeding my progress towards that…. Check out this beauty:

I saw this couch in her studio and realized that I must have it.

Of course, today is Thanksgiving, so I should be counting my blessings instead of coveting things… but I just can’t help it!

Dear Santa,

on the balcony at grandpa's farm in idaho

I know it’s a little bit early to start writing Christmas letters, but it feels right in my heart so I’m doing it. Last year, I had some pretty specific wants (which, by the way, thanks for the scarf and for the red dress going on sale after Christmas), and although I have some certain items in mind for this year (a couple of dresses, a new digital camera, pretty clothes and accessories, a tv for Brad, and lots and lots of shoes), I think what I really need is some direction.

You know, where to go next, what to do after that, which passions to follow. Should I go to grad school for medical anthropology and possibly be a pilates instructor? Or should I study for the MCAT so I can apply to D.O. school? Or what about the fashion design programs that are popping up all over? And graphic design? I haven’t forgotten about that one either. My brain is divided into a million pieces, and I’m curious where they all will land.

Maybe what I’m asking for is a fortune teller, but seriously, I could use your help.

love.whitney

“Some [get] no further than accumulating these verbal snapshots. . . in the early, rough-draft stages, there are few things more pleasurable than bringing up a memory and transcribing it directly, like a wide-awake dream.” - Philip Lopate

Join 25 other followers

Things You Missed Out On

I Tweet.